Two to three days a week, my coworkers hit up this Thai place called Lemongrass (or something, I don’t really know) and like all Asian places that don’t want to get review-bombed for daring to make it only about the food, this place offers fortune cookies. That’s right, a Thai restaurant in Germany offers Fortune cookies because some dude in San Francisco in 1918 stole a Japanese cookie idea (that he undoubtedly just called ‘oriental’) and made it popular. It gets me wondering as well, you ever notice that since your very first fortune cookie, people have complained that they don’t tell fortunes anymore? My first memory of a fortune cookie is from when I was five, back in 1999. That’s 23 years ago now, And guess what, I remember the adults bickering about it back then, as well: “These aren’t fortunes! Remember when they used to tell fortunes?” Did they? I’m actually wondering, now. Did they ever do that? Does anyone remember a fortune cookie that has told a fortune, a genuine prophecy? Maybe that was always too much to put on the lowly typists in Guangzhou, China, who have been CTRL+C ->CTRL+V’ing the same 200 ‘fortunes’ since 2005. These are 8 year old we’re talking about. But this time, I did sincerely enjoy my message. I will look back on it fondly every time I take its advice. I would love to see it get even more casual, though. For my next cookie, I want it to just say, “take a load off”, like the paper message thinks I’m inside the cookie and it wants me to be comfortable. I’d like that.
Otherwise it was the typical Friday workplace affair. Worked until about 4, had a couple meetings, typed up a couple scripts, etc. Then played some Rocket League and had a beer and came home. Made it to the DHL pickup station by the skin of my teeth to pick up the five boxes of heartburn pills I ordered from an online pharmacy. Yes, I suffered through acid reflux for days simply to avoid dealing with actual pharmacists. Last time I went to the pharmacy, the lady immediately spoke english to me (even though I asked my question in German), which was already an insult, and then told me not to get the pills I wanted! She said no! Gave me some pepto-type gogurt squeeze packets instead. Guess what, that pink slime might’ve even made things worse. So no, I don’t talk to these heartburn gatekeepers anymore. I order pills online when I’ve already been out for a week to maximize my own suffering and shed tears of relief when my new stash arrives. I’m a gentleman.
See you tomorrow.
Nick
Nick Denardi 