Now, If I’m a guy at a friend’s party, and I’m drunk, and I see my friend crying, and I hear those words come out of Cindy’s mouth, there’s only one conclusion I come to, and there’s only one response I have to that conclusion. Berniebro didn’t do shit, which is to be expected, but some hulking gymbro named Tommy sure didn’t waste any goddamn time. I got out one sentence, I think. Something like, “Okay, could you not say it like that?”, which of course, was not that right thing to say nor the right way to say it.

Then I heard Nicoletta scream, “Tommy, no!” and before I could turn my head there was a fist to meet me halfway.