Introduction – The Journey to Endless (Devastating) Rejection Begins Now

I have made it no secret: I want to be published. I will do it myself if necessary, but that conclusion doesn’t really excite me; I need the validation of a gatekeeper. I hate to say it, but I do. This diary will function as a log of updates toward that dream, but also a place to discuss the behind-the-scenes of writing a book and attempting to get it published.

So, quick entry 001: I am an aspiring American novelist living in Germany. I have a Bachelors in English which I barely squeaked out and a Masters in American Studies which I am quite proud of, as I was able to learn from (or at least be close to) the current contingent of The Frankfurt School. A PhD is in the cards at some point, but only if I get wealthy by other means first (fat chance). Book wise, I have recently finished revising the fourth or fifth draft of my first novel, which was finished sometime between February and November of 2025. Maybe that can be worth it’s own entry: what the hell counts as a finished draft? I wrote the “final” sentence in February but the structure was so broken at that point I had no feeling of accomplishment at all.

Anyway, that is what I’m working with now. I am currently sending out queries to agents, and am ready to begin my next project, which is looking like it will be a short story collection centered around more pulpy, horror-adjacent ideas, but with some twists. Hopefully the entries in the diary from here on out will be more thematically concrete, as I would love to talk about this process with others in the same boat.